have you ever just fealt really empty? you know how to fill it. but you cant. you reach. and reach. but nothing is enough.
i messed up. i messed up bad. and i cant take back what i said. but i dont want to. i need to learn from myself. i was made wrong. i cant learn from other peoples mistakes. im just abnormal. fml. i miss him so much. its like a twisting iron. its uncomfortable. to say the least.
but like usual. im going to put on a mask. so everyone can be happy. and wallow in my grief alone.
DEE's house tomorrow nightish. bonfire. il drown my sorrows in andrew's liquor. yayy. hahaha. i love my friends. theyre the bestest.
list of things people say that upset me:
-"no youre not" in response to im sorry. IF I WASNT I WOULDNT HAVE APOLOGIZED
-"it will be okay"
-"you should be able to do this"
-"easier said than done" DONT SAY IT
-"i used to love you"
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